Zombie Coming Through

Day 10 – Move It!

I felt like moving this morning. So at 5am I was out with my hound, running. When I say running, I mean stumbling forward without falling over. Do I feel good for doing it? Hell no. Will I do it again. Yup. Even the dog was looking at me like “wtf”

Day 11 – The Walking Dead

Yesterday I ran, some of you may have read.

While I was running I had Sabotage, by the Beastie Boys, blasting and in my mind I looked like Rocky in one of those montage scenes.

In reality I looked like a 46 yr old, 20 stone zombie from the walking dead – just stumbling along. Not one of the good looking zombies either. I’m talking one with body parts missing, whose make-up was done by a toddler with a permanent marker.

How do I know what I looked like. My body is telling me today. Ahhhh pain.

This is not a negative. I’ll be running again tomorrow – I hope its misty and there are other people around. I want to hear the screams of horror as they see a zombie tellytubby lurching from the fog.

Sad Black And White GIF - Find & Share on GIPHY

This is a positive. It reminds me of the toll alcohol has had on my body. 18 months ago I was 5 stone lighter, working out everyday, eating good food. I let booze take over and now the only exercise I get is getting out of the car to grab a Greggs sausage roll.

I am NOT going back to that. Each lurch forward on the run is painful, but one in the right direction for my health.

Day 12 – Betrayal

Turns out I’am the literal princess and the pea.

Dialled my sleep routine in so well, any slight deviation and that pea feels like a boulder.

Usual routine – bed, book, bit of jazz playing low, then when I am ready for sleep I play rain sounds (thats a throwback to spending 18 months in a caravan in Scotland – I went native).

While I am dozing off my little cat Lilly uses me as a bed (literally beds down on my belly) – she’s tiny, but that little bit of weight is reassuring.

Lilly slept elsewhere last night. She cheated on me with a comfy new cat bad. 😢

WORSE NIGHTS SLEEP EVA!!!!

Never knew I was such a sensitive soul. Choosing sobriety is making me feel all the feels. Thats cool, its nice to be feeling again…but DAMN LILLY WHY DID YOU LEAVE ME!!!!!!

Anyway, here’s Lilly….she got chucked off the bed by her big bro and sis. Karma.

Day 13 – Jamie Lee Curtis Ass Kicking

Its day 13 AF, its Friday. I’m not superstitious, but if I can kick alcohols arse on a Friday, on the 13th day then call me Jamie Lee Curtis. Was she even in those films? I don’t know, never watched them. I just know she kicked ass in whatever film.

Jamie Lee Curtis Make Good Choices GIF - Find & Share on GIPHY

Its been a rough week. Depression, work stress and now back pain. I’ve been ground hogging it a bit. Just getting through. Wake, work, sleep, wake, work, sleep… Its a phase, it will pass.

Happy to report alcohol hasn’t been consumed. On the challenge page they have the bit “The Importance of Quit Lit”. I didn’t realise how true this was until this week. I’ve had the usual stress at work, which brings with it the thoughts of having a drink. On the way home I’ve been listening to Catherine Grays The Unexpected Joy of Being Sober”. Amazing book. Its like a constant reminder of why i’m doing this, so by the time I get home the “need” for alcohol is gone. She’s my new hero.

What has your week been like?